Mother's Wedding Present

5            On the first of October, 1966, God and a judge named Shomer
6       gave me a husband.  I remember laughing over the thought that the
7       judge's name meant "watchman" or "guardian" in Hebrew. I didn't
8       know how much his guardianship would be needed.
9            The pelting rain falling from a slate gray sky on my wedding
10     day had given me its present too: a massive head cold that left
11     me sniffling, feverish and generally miserable.  So, a week after
12     the ceremony we were sitting in the waiting room of a doctor's
13     office near our apartment.
14          It was also just a month  into the first semester of my
15     senior year at Temple University.  I had nothing more pressing to
16     think about than trying to breathe and simultaneously wondering
17     what to write for the English essay that was due Monday and what
18     to do for supper that evening.
19          The door opened and a very tall, Black policeman strode in.
20     I was sitting down and he looked as though he were seven feet
21     tall.
22          He glanced around the waiting room and asked "Is G-----
23     R----- here?" in a loud, authoritative voice. In some shock I stood up.
24     It didn't help. He still looked seven feet tall. He was dressed in his
25     dark blue uniform with its shiny silver badge and his highly polished
26     black leather boots and his duty gun at his side in a shiny black
27     leather holster.
28          "I was G----- R-----," I said. "I'm now G-----
29     T-------," and I nodded at my new husband. The police officer suddenly
30     looked as sick as I felt.
31          "Would you please step outside?" he asked. We
32     walked outside and he said, "I'm sorry Mrs. T-------, but you're under
33     arrest."
34           I couldn't think.  I could only cry.  Fighting to be as
35     levelheaded as possible, I asked the officer whether we could stop by
36     the apartment to get some papers: our birth certificates and the wedding
37     license.  Yes, we could do that.  He put us into the squad car and we
38     drove the few blocks to the apartment, where we gathered up the
39     necessary papers.  Naively I thought that just showing them to the
40     officials would make everything right. Then we drove from the apartment
41     to the Camden County (New Jersey) Jail.
42          We weren't photographed or fingerprinted, and everyone
43     sounded very sympathetic when they heard the charge, but a
44     warrant had been sworn out and their duty was clear. We would
45     stay at the jail unless we could post bail, guaranteeing our
46     presence at a trial.
47          There definitely would be a trial. Because she wanted to
48     break up our marriage, my mother had sworn out a warrant charging
49     us with fornication. We found out abruptly that some communities
50     had an old law that made it a crime to engage in sex without
51     marriage.  It was seldom thought of, much less used. Camden, New
52     Jersey was one of the communities where the law was still on the
53     books.  I knew we were innocent of that charge, but who would
54     believe us?  I wondered briefly if I'd be allowed back in school
55     after this?
56          Lawyers? Who thought of needing a lawyer? We had only been
57     married a week.  We couldn't afford one even if we knew who to
58     call. And the bail was seventy-five dollars, a monumental sum
59     when our joint income was sixty-five dollars a week.
60          We tried calling this person and that one.  No one we tried
61     was at home. I began to imagine that we'd be in that place until
62     the trial came up or until the end of the semester.  We tried
63     calling Rob's minister.  He was out too.
64         As all this was going on, I needed to use the rest room.  My
65     embarrassment was magnified a thousand times when the jail matron
66     got up and went into the ladies' room with me. It was the most
67     ordinary of human functions but I was not permitted to be alone.
68          Is that what it's like to be a prisoner?
69      Then we thought of calling Judge Shomer. He was in, and said
70     that if we couldn't find anyone else, he would come to the jail
71     and get us out on his word. No, he couldn't defend us himself,
72     but he said he'd get one of the lawyers in his office to do it.
73          I felt better.  We tried Rob's minister again, and he was
74     home.  Yes, he'd come down and bail us out, but we'd have to
75     repay the seventy-five dollars later.  Yes, we'd soon be free.
76         We spent four hours in the Camden County Jail.  Each minute
77     seemed like a year. I remember crying and praying a lot.
78         No one was rough with us or nasty to us.   In fact,
79     everyone was as gentle as they could be, considering the
80     circumstances.  Nevertheless, the thought that I was not free to
81     walk out the door or even go to the rest room whenever I chose
82     was as effective as fastening a heavy ball and chain around my
83     leg.  I felt imprisoned.
84         The minister came, paid the bail, and we walked out free
85     into the sunlight.
86         I'd never appreciated how important doing what I wanted,
87     when I wanted to do it was to me before. I'd never been in any
88     trouble with the law either.  Inside I was humiliated, angry and
89     bitter. Nothing, I vowed, would ever bring me there again.
90 
91         The semester continued, but as if under a cloud.  I did what I had
92     to do, but all our energy was devoted to getting ready for the
93     trial.
94         The trial date finally came. Mother's lawyer dropped the
95     charges as we stood before the judge on the condition that we'd
96     meet with her later. I agreed.  The judge promptly dismissed the
97     charges "with prejudice," meaning that they could never be
98     refiled.
99         Going down in the elevator to leave the building,  I turned
100     to Rob and said, "I guess I'll have to meet with the old dragon." I
101     was so tired, so angry, and so resentful.  I didn't notice that
102     Mother's lawyer also was in the elevator with us and had
103     overheard my comment.  The meeting was never held.
104         It took years for the bitterness and anger to slowly drain
105     away.  It was years before I realized that the arrest and the
106     trial had been Mother's wedding gift to us. She, the victim of
107     two failed marriages, had unknowingly kept ours from failing.
108         During that first year, we'd spent so much time and energy
109     fighting the charges she brought that we had no time to fight
110     between ourselves. During that year we'd bonded so closely that
111     no matter how hard we fought later, and we did, divorce was forever
112     out of the question.  There were even times that we joked about
113     it.  "Divorce ? Never! Murder . . .well . . . maybe."
114 
115        Years later, a song by husband and wife songwriters Steve
116     and Annie Chapman said it for me:
117 
118              Oh the ships are burning,
119              There'll be no turning back for you and me.
120              Whatever we find here, we've made it clear
121              This is where we'll always be.
122              On this island of pleasure, there'll be some danger
123              And we might think about returning
124              We both know we won't go, that's why
125              the ships are burning. (1)
126 
127        Because I had stood up to her, I had burned my ships behind
128     me.  No matter what happened between Rob and myself, there would
129     be no running home to mother.  We'd have to work it out ourselves
130     or else.  And with God's help, we have.
131     Footnote:
132         (1)  "The Ships Are Burning" by Steve and Annie Chapman -
133                 Chordant Productions